YCS Greatest Bracket Ever (Maurice Clarett Regional)

FIRST ROUND
#1 John Wooden vs. #16 University of Michigan Football Helmets
#8 Barnum & Bailey Circus vs. #9 The Light Bulb
#4 1999 Manchester United vs. #13 Coach K
#5 Tiger Woods vs. #12 Harlem Globetrotters
#3 Jesus Christ vs. #14 Everything about Anna Kournikova besides her mind
#6 1924 Notre Dame Football vs. #11 Iona
#7 Woodstock vs. #10 The Forward Pass
#2 Discovery of Fire vs. #15 Jimmy Johnson's Hairpiece

RESULTS
-- Wooden could coach circles around the Michigan football helmets, and conversely, could coach a team of football helmets to at least a 4th-place showing in the Pac-10.
-- We couldn't see the circus without the light bulb now could we?
-- Coach K won 3 titles in a quarter-century at Duke. Manchester United won 3 titles in one season in 1999 taking the Premier League, FA Cup, and Champions League titles.
-- Tiger has won 11 major championships. While the 'Trotters rarely lose, they never really WIN anything either.
-- You have to have a pretty sick mind to fantasize about Jesus Christ.
-- It didn't seem like a real bracket without the Iona Gaels, but they go down in the first round as usual.
-- Indeed, the forward pass revolutionized football, but Woodstock was a pivotal moment in history as it arguably represented the highest point of "the 60s."
-- While initally resistant, Jimmy's hairpiece succombs to the inferno in a blaze of glory.

SECOND ROUND
#1 John Wooden vs. #9 The Light Bulb
#4 1999 Manchester United vs. #5 Tiger Woods
#14 Everything about Anna Kournikova except her mind vs. #6 1924 Notre Dame Football
#7 Woodstock vs. #2 Fire

RESULTS
-- Wooden was a master strategist, but you can't win if you can't see in the dark.
-- In 1999, Tiger Woods won 1 out of 4 majors. Man United won 2 of the 7 biggest competitions in world club football. Glory Glory Man United.
-- After seeing nothing more risque than a flapper tipsy on apple juice, and having been raised in good Irish Catholic homes, the Domers are stunned at the mere sight of the Russian vixen.
-- Be honest, if it weren't for fire and its practical uses, would people even be talking about Woodstock?

SWEET 16
#9 The Light Bulb vs. #4 1999 Manchester United
#14 Everything about Anna Kournikova besides her mind vs. #2 Fire

RESULTS
-- 1999 Man U didn't need light bulbs as the celebratory flares went off in the European Cup final victory.
-- Anna may be smokin' hot, but where there's smoke there's…you guessed it.

QUARTERFINALS
#4 1999 Manchester United vs. #2 Fire

RESULTS
-- Fire was discovered by man by simply rubbing two sticks or rocks together. Manchester United had to hold off stiff competition domestically, and had to come from behind and score twice in stoppage time to beat Bayern Munich in the 1999 Champions League Final. (Fast forward to 3:30 unless you like the drama.)

1999 Manchester United moves on to the Final Four. They have reached...the Promised Land!